Q: How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Yes.
Prolog 2
Q: How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: No.
Another Bulb
Q: How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None, that's a hardware problem.
Yet Another Bulb
Q: How many hardware engineer does it take to change in a lightbulb?
A: None, it's a software problem.
Microsoft
Q: how many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, they just make darkness a standard and tell everyone "this behavior is by design".
Intel
Q: How many Intel hardware engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 1.0000000000001736442, it's close enough for most people.
To be or not to be
0xFF (in 8-bit integer)
Java
“Knock, knock.”
“Who’s there?”
very long pause….
“Java.”
Perl
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.
C++
Why doesn't C++ have a garbage collector?
Because there would be nothing left!
String
These two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, "So what'll it be?"
The first string says, "I think I'll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy owmc63^Dz x.xvcu"
"Please excuse my friend," the second string says, "He isn't null-terminated."
Keyboard
Keyboard not found ...
Press any key to continue
Vista
How long does it take to copy a file in Vista?
Yeah, I don't know either, I'm still waiting to find out.
Old C Programmer
Old C programmers don't die, they're just cast into void.
Intelligent Design Sort
Introduction
Intelligent design sort is a sorting algorithm based on the theory of intelligent design.
Algorithm Description
The probability of the original input list being in the exact order it's in is 1/(n!). There is such a small likelihood of this that it's clearly absurd to say that this happened by chance, so it must have been consciously put in that order by an intelligent Sorter. Therefore it's safe to assume that it's already optimally Sorted in some way that transcends our naïve mortal understanding of "ascending order". Any attempt to change that order to conform to our own preconceptions would actually make it less sorted.
Analysis
This algorithm is constant in time, and sorts the list in-place, requiring no additional memory at all. In fact, it doesn't even require any of that suspicious technological computer stuff. Praise the Sorter!
Better World
I'd like to make the world a better place, but they won't give me the source code.
Reply: I doubt it you'll have many problems about legacy code.
Being
불판도 갈렸는데 유머나 몇 개..
SQL Query
An SQL query walks into a bar and sees two tables. He walks up to them and says 'Can I join you?'
Lisp code of NASA
I have the last page code of rocket launch program in NASA written in Lisp:
))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) ))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) )))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Lisp 2
Lots of Insignificant Stupid Parentheses
Prolog
Q: How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Yes.
Prolog 2
Q: How many prolog programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: No.
Another Bulb
Q: How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: None, that's a hardware problem.
Yet Another Bulb
Q: How many hardware engineer does it take to change in a lightbulb?
A: None, it's a software problem.
Microsoft
Q: how many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, they just make darkness a standard and tell everyone "this behavior is by design".
Intel
Q: How many Intel hardware engineers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 1.0000000000001736442, it's close enough for most people.
To be or not to be
0xFF (in 8-bit integer)
Java
“Knock, knock.”
“Who’s there?”
very long pause….
“Java.”
Perl
If you put a million monkeys at a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program.
The rest of them will write Perl programs.
C++
Why doesn't C++ have a garbage collector?
Because there would be nothing left!
String
These two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, "So what'll it be?"
The first string says, "I think I'll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy owmc63^Dz x.xvcu"
"Please excuse my friend," the second string says, "He isn't null-terminated."
Keyboard
Keyboard not found ...
Press any key to continue
Vista
How long does it take to copy a file in Vista?
Yeah, I don't know either, I'm still waiting to find out.
Old C Programmer
Old C programmers don't die, they're just cast into void.
Intelligent Design Sort
Introduction
Intelligent design sort is a sorting algorithm based on the theory of intelligent design.
Algorithm Description
The probability of the original input list being in the exact order it's in is 1/(n!). There is such a small likelihood of this that it's clearly absurd to say that this happened by chance, so it must have been consciously put in that order by an intelligent Sorter. Therefore it's safe to assume that it's already optimally Sorted in some way that transcends our naïve mortal understanding of "ascending order". Any attempt to change that order to conform to our own preconceptions would actually make it less sorted.
Analysis
This algorithm is constant in time, and sorts the list in-place, requiring no additional memory at all. In fact, it doesn't even require any of that suspicious technological computer stuff. Praise the Sorter!
Better World
I'd like to make the world a better place, but they won't give me the source code.
Reply: I doubt it you'll have many problems about legacy code.
Sweet Home
There's no place like 127.0.0.1.
There's no place like ::1.
There's no place like ~.
1
Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right?
A: 1.
14년 전